Camel Cash
I guess smoking does pay off, in its own weird way.
About three or four months ago I signed up for the Camel Lights mailing list, and RJ Renolds has been bombarding my mailbox with advertisements ever since.
I really don't mind. I actually look forward to them. They're really clever little pieces of mail-art. It's hard to explain. You can tell some petty hip advertising execs spent a lot of time coming up with this "Roaring 2000's" ad campaign... They ads themselves are printed on heavy stock, with paintings that lushly depict 20's era swingers as they drink, gamble, and enjoy fresh, delicious Camel cigarettes. Several of the ads came in trifold, with flaps that opened up to reveal a hidden treasure, like a 100 free C-notes or coupons for $1 off two packs/$4 off a carton. One ad came in the form of an old 20's era newspaper. Another announced a grand prize trip to see Velvet Revolver in Miami. Yet another ad offered you your favorite pack of regular smokes, as well as a second box of exotic blends, for free. All you had to do was put a little sticker representing the pack you wanted onto a postcard and mail it back (postage paid in the U.S.!) I should be getting 2 free packs of smokes in the mail sometime near the end of next month.
But then this morning I decided to check out the rest of their Camel Cash catalog on-line. I clicked onto the November '04 section of the catalog, and when I saw it, I HAD TO HAVE IT.
A 100% suede mocha jacket, with interior zipper, and a pocket for your cell-phone. It only comes in large, but that's okay, I can still look damn cool in it. I have to use Hello! to post an image of the jacket, so I can't include it here in the text, but you can see it in the picture immediately proceeding this post (or by clicking here).
Only 800 C-notes and $6.00 S+H!! I hurried upstairs and pulled out all my C-notes in a massive frenzy of greed and impatience. I counted them out. 100... 200... 300... 400... 500(!)... 600(!!)... 700(!!!!)... plus the free 100 C-notes from the ad... made 800 C-NOTES*.
I only have $1.48 to my name, but I work tonight. One of my tables dooesn't know it, but they're going to buy me a SUEDE JACKET! WOO-HOO!!
I'm mailing out the form tomorrow. I already printed it out and signed it. I should expect delivery within 10-12 weeks, which would put it right around February. I'll take some pictures of me showing off in it and post it here then!
I can't wait!!
* Minus the 100 C-note I received in the ad, I own over 700 pieces of Camel Cash. That equals 700+ packs of cigarettes. That's 14,000 cigarettes I've smoked in the past seven years. 700 packs, at around roughly 3.50 a pack... that's $2,450...I think I've bought this damn jacket twice over... Besides, I'm paying them big bucks to kill me slowly and painfully. I think I deserve a little something in return.
About three or four months ago I signed up for the Camel Lights mailing list, and RJ Renolds has been bombarding my mailbox with advertisements ever since.
I really don't mind. I actually look forward to them. They're really clever little pieces of mail-art. It's hard to explain. You can tell some petty hip advertising execs spent a lot of time coming up with this "Roaring 2000's" ad campaign... They ads themselves are printed on heavy stock, with paintings that lushly depict 20's era swingers as they drink, gamble, and enjoy fresh, delicious Camel cigarettes. Several of the ads came in trifold, with flaps that opened up to reveal a hidden treasure, like a 100 free C-notes or coupons for $1 off two packs/$4 off a carton. One ad came in the form of an old 20's era newspaper. Another announced a grand prize trip to see Velvet Revolver in Miami. Yet another ad offered you your favorite pack of regular smokes, as well as a second box of exotic blends, for free. All you had to do was put a little sticker representing the pack you wanted onto a postcard and mail it back (postage paid in the U.S.!) I should be getting 2 free packs of smokes in the mail sometime near the end of next month.
But then this morning I decided to check out the rest of their Camel Cash catalog on-line. I clicked onto the November '04 section of the catalog, and when I saw it, I HAD TO HAVE IT.
A 100% suede mocha jacket, with interior zipper, and a pocket for your cell-phone. It only comes in large, but that's okay, I can still look damn cool in it. I have to use Hello! to post an image of the jacket, so I can't include it here in the text, but you can see it in the picture immediately proceeding this post (or by clicking here).
Only 800 C-notes and $6.00 S+H!! I hurried upstairs and pulled out all my C-notes in a massive frenzy of greed and impatience. I counted them out. 100... 200... 300... 400... 500(!)... 600(!!)... 700(!!!!)... plus the free 100 C-notes from the ad... made 800 C-NOTES*.
I only have $1.48 to my name, but I work tonight. One of my tables dooesn't know it, but they're going to buy me a SUEDE JACKET! WOO-HOO!!
I'm mailing out the form tomorrow. I already printed it out and signed it. I should expect delivery within 10-12 weeks, which would put it right around February. I'll take some pictures of me showing off in it and post it here then!
I can't wait!!
* Minus the 100 C-note I received in the ad, I own over 700 pieces of Camel Cash. That equals 700+ packs of cigarettes. That's 14,000 cigarettes I've smoked in the past seven years. 700 packs, at around roughly 3.50 a pack... that's $2,450...I think I've bought this damn jacket twice over... Besides, I'm paying them big bucks to kill me slowly and painfully. I think I deserve a little something in return.
posted by Billy at 1:29 PM
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