It's a gorgeous day outside, 76 degrees in the middle of July, with a gentle breeze. The few clouds float like parade balloons across the sky. Tree leaves scuttle in the distance. Pink cherry blossoms and purple flox and tomato plants bend and sway rhythmically to Nature's metronome.

Snacking on Mom's rhubarb in the back yard with a good book and the sun shining down on me, it's hard to imagine why I feel so bad. I don't know why... I try to figure it out, try to analyze and quantify it, balance the equation... but everything's irrational.